Something to Think About

Something to Think About 09/28/11

I was on the train after school today, talking to a classmate who really gave me something to think about. We got to talking about what our husbands do for a living and I mentioned that mine is in the Air Force. When she asked if he'd been overseas I told her he had been three times and actually just came home in May. The fact that he's only been home a few months still comes as a shock to some people since I am now pregnant and really looking like it! I also mentioned that technically he wasn't actually scheduled to be home until possibly September but came home due to medical reasons. She said we have an amazing story and that we are having a miracle baby. I'm not really the kind of person who believes in miracles or gifts from above but she definitely gave me something to think about.

I actually thought about this for quite awhile this afternoon. I realized how much people seem to dwell on the negatives that happen and really fail to see the silver lining in things. All summer I have been struggling with how to deal with the helicopter crash and all the stuff that happened after and really how to sift through all of my emotions. When my husband came home early, I thought all of the bad feelings would go away but they didn't. I've had a hard time realizing that things could have been a lot worse and that we really have a lot to be thankful for.

As I said earlier, he wasn't scheduled to be home from Afghanistan until possibly September. But when the crash happened and he got injured, he was able to come home in May. That in itself is a huge positive that came out of all of this. And if he hadn't come home early, we definitely would not be expecting our first child right now. And if he wasn't home until September, well, we'd still be trying to get pregnant. So really, this baby is special in so many more ways than I first thought.  There were a few times this summer that I really did realize how lucky we were and how special this baby is but the fears and worries surrounding everything else always crept back in. Now, I guess after having someone outside of the situation say it out loud, I really clued in that my baby is the best and most positive thing that has resulted from the nightmare that we all went through this summer. I just feel sad that it took me this long to realize it.

I may not believe in miracles but I do believe that everything happens for a reason. I guess everything we went through over the past few months happened so that this baby could be born. And I think that's pretty awesome. Now to find away to make the next four and a half months go by faster so I can meet him/her...  :)